I don't know if this is fun, but my brother has raised the act of watching TV to an art form. He's got a couch that is exactly 6 inches longer than he is tall, and I know for a fact that he consulted a seamstress to have custom made cushions. He's got TiVo, so he'll never miss his favorite shows. He's got an arrangement with Sam, down at the corner store, so he'll never run out of his favorite chips, either. It's scary, the amount of effort he has put into watching TV.
He recently got a dog, a big, friendly Rottwieler, and he taught it to facilitate his television habit.
The dog can fetch the remote control. My brother keeps a roll of paper towels under the cushions of the couch, for slobber control.
The dog can also open the fridge, and get a beer. He can only manage the long neck bottles right now, but my brother is working with him on picking up cans. He (my brother) keeps a bottle opener and a tube of non-water hand cleanser in the end table drawer, to reasons of sanitation during beer drinking.
The dog can even close the door on the fridge, after safely delivering a beer.
My brother has told me that if he could teach the dog to go and actually buy the beer, than everything would be perfect. I wondered, but not out loud, if this had anything to do with his divorce?
1 comment:
My husband-in-law [that's a word I just made up; it means my wife's ex-husband] was the same way. That's why she divorced him and became available to marry me. Every day I say: Thank G-d for TV; if not for TV I would still be a lonely bachelor.
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